Let’s start at the beginning: If we constantly took all our fears at face value, we would be busy 24 hours a day. That’s why it’s important that you take a closer look at those fears that have been standing in your way for ages. Which of these are really justified? Note these. Start with your greatest fear. Look at each one individually and rate them for validity.
How To Live A Life Without Fears
Review Your Fears
Let’s start at the beginning: If we constantly took all our fears at face value, we would be busy 24 hours a day. That’s why it’s important that you take a closer look at those fears that have been standing in your way for ages. Which of these are really justified? Note these. Start with your greatest fear. Look at each one individually and rate them for validity.
Draw On Positive Experiences
Are you about to make your dream come true? Then it won’t help you much if you indulge in your destructive thoughts. It’s also not advisable to dig into the past to say, “but it didn’t work out then”. Put your focus on the things that were good and worked in a situation. This is how you encourage yourself and strengthen your back. So concerns can be pushed aside and hope can take its place.
Shift Your Focus From Inside To Outside
When we are scared, we often direct all of our focus inwards, on our thoughts, the catastrophic scenarios that our heads are concocting and our physical panic reactions such as palpitations, sweating, tremors, etc. When you focus on your fear like this, you get caught in a whirlpool that steers you away from what actually IS right now. It is then important that you focus on perceiving the reality around you in order to “make real” something other than your own fear.
Confront Yourself To Overcome Fears
If you are afraid of a certain situation, it helps if you expose yourself to it. Let’s assume that you would like to give lectures. But you fear that you are not up to the situation. Her fear says, “You’ll stutter, lose track, and turn red as a tomato.” Do you know what helps against such fears? Just do what you are afraid of. In most cases, it doesn’t get half as bad as you think.
Change Your Interpretation Of The Situation
Let’s remember: It’s never the situation, but the interpretation that triggers a feeling, in our case that scares you. The good news is that it is entirely possible to change your interpretation of a situation by giving your subconscious the opportunity to choose different interpretations.
Be Nice To Yourself
If you find yourself in a situation that usually triggers your fear, find a loving (imaginary) companion. Give this companion the task of supporting you and coaxing you well. You can also do this by talking lovingly to yourself and encouraging yourself to do a certain activity. “I can do it”, “You have already mastered more difficult situations”, “You have nothing to lose” – and the fear automatically subsides without you having to rely on others.
Small Steps
Last but not least, and with a little tongue in cheek, what really helps is when you practice facing your fears over and over again. Do it like in a computer game: Don’t start with the final game… It’s best to write down a kind of fear hierarchy: What is one situation that scares me the most? Which situation scares me a little less? What kind of situation would be roughly in the middle range? And what am I just a little scared of, but enough to swallow a bit?